We have officially had our Tristan for a whole month and time seriously has flown by. I know this is said often about new babies, but it really does. We have had so many people love on us and support us through this huge transition and join in welcoming our baby boy into the world. Which by the way, happened exactly 2 weeks early to the day! But I will get to that in a bit. We wanted to first thank everyone for all the love and generosity throughout this last month. We are feeling so blessed! Now to the good stuff. I am giving all the details…the good, bad, tough times and great ones. If you are one of those “TMI” people, this may not be for you. But for those who want the details, here goes nothing.
Tristan John Michael Gorman decided it was his time to arrive at 5am on Tuesday, February 12th when I woke up in a frantic state. Realizing my water broke in my sleep and “holy crap this is happening” kicked in. I called the doctor, woke up my husband, jumped in the shower, and packed up the car. We decided to wait it out at home till contractions were steady. We were anxiously waiting and wanting things to move quickly! Six long hours later, we jumped in the car and head to the hospital. Contractions were about 5 minutes apart at this point and relatively painful. Once we arrived, I was checked by the triage nurse and confirmed (YUP this is happening). I was dilated 3-4cm at this point and the next phase of the waiting game began.
We were admitted to the labor and delivery room and little did we know then, we would be there for the long haul. I waited as long as I could to get an epidural, which put us at about 2:30pm. The anesthesiologist came in and explained the procedure (I hate needles by the way. Something you have to very quickly get over during child birth!) and got started on the process. They placed the needle in, and this is where the crazy began. The needle went a little too far and created a small hole, releasing a slow spinal fluid leak. Though we would find this out later and not in the moment. They tried once more and got it in the right space. After that, my blood pressure dropped dramatically and Tristan’s heart rate was slowing. My whole body from the waist down went numb. Too numb. Ten or so nurses rushed into the room to stabilize us, and quickly after Tristan’s heart rate was back and steady. Praise the Lord! Scary is an understatement. Shortly following I was checked again and still at 4cm. At this point they decided to put me on pitocin to get my contracts moving.
The contractions got much stronger and much longer. Some lasting up to 12 minutes! But still…4 cm. At this point we are coming up on 10:30pm with no movement. I looked at Kevin and think we both knew a C section was in the near future. My doctor came in at this point and told us that if in an hour there was no progress, they would take us back for surgery. I cried out of both fear and relief. Knowing that within the hour our boy would finally be here. But in a way we were a little unprepared for to say the least. Come the next hour, we were taken back for surgery to meet our baby boy.
The C section came and went in about 30 minutes total. It was a whirlwind of numbing medication, blue scrubs, lots of doctors, nurses, and nervous tears from the two of us. Our medical team was amazing throughout this entire process, I must say! All I could focus on was Kevin, keeping me grounded and holding my hand and reassuring me everything was going to be okay through it all. As soon as I got strapped down to the bed (yes they strap your arms down) it was only 10 minutes or so after we heard the first cry of our baby boy! We cried, A LOT. So excited to finally meet him and hear his perfect little cry. Kevin went to a separate room to meet him while the surgery was finished. Soon after he came in with Tristan and I was able to meet him face to face. Our perfect, cone headed little lump of baby was FINALLY here! One of our nurses captured the moment perfectly for us.
Shortly after, we were brought back to a recovery room where we spent a few hours bonding skin to skin, crying over our sweet boy, attempting to recover a bit from exhaustion, and being so joyous it is hard to put into words. But, there were some set backs. My blood pressure was extremely high which led to being put on a magnesium drip. Guys, this was horrible. I mean HORRIBLE. But luckily I was able to regulate in less then 24 hours and come off of it before heading to our permanent room at about 4:30pm on the 13th. I was able to eat after almost two days (cue the Chipotle). At this point they had me get out of bed to walk (or attempt to), removed the catheter from surgery, and I was put on oxycodone for pain. I got back in the bed and we rolled our little family on down to our next room.
As soon as we got into the next room, I experienced excruciating pain in my pelvis. I couldn’t hold back the tears, hardly get words out, clenching every muscle in my body kind of pain. Well turns out my bladder was about to explode from the removal of the catheter and being on pain meds. I know, sounds wonderful right? It was as painful as it sounds. The incredible team of nurses were right on fixing the issue, and on we went to grab a few minutes of sleep. All I have to say from here on out is that my husband is an angel, and I have never been more appreciative for him in my life. I was bed ridden as he changed all the diapers, held the baby for hours, helped us get used to breast feeding, lost lots of sleep, helped me change, communicated with family and the medical team, was my constant emotional support, I could go on for hours. Without him I really don’t think I could have taken care of our son.
We spent 4 long days in the hospital and were eager to get our baby home. Saturday afternoon we were discharged and over the moon excited to head home! But the nigh before I started experiencing what felt like the worst tension headache possible. It got progressively worse as the days went on. I thought it was likely from being in a bed for 5 days, nursing around the clock and sleeping in a horrible hospital bed. But remember that initial epidural that caused a spinal fluid leak? WELL turns out this was creating the worlds worst headache that I just could not shake. The only way I could function was laying completely flat. On Monday morning Kevin and I went to the ER to get this head ache fixed so I could care for our son. I had a procedure done called a blood patch. This is essentially an epidural with your own blood injected into the leak to stop it. Sounds crazy, right? I have never been more thankful for a procedure in my entire life. It immediately cured me and I could function again!!
After this miracle procedure, we went home and began our true recovery from surgery and adjusting to our life at home together. The weeks to follow have been the most life changing, incredible weeks of our lives. We spend most of our time looking at our boy in amazement that we created this life. A beautiful, perfectly made boy that we get to call ours. This transition into parenthood has been a crazy wild ride, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
We have gotten a lot of questions about his name! Truthfully, we just really loved the name Tristan and there is not much meaning behind it for us. But what I will say, is that we have had his name picked out since we were 18. We have always said that if one day we were to have a baby boy there is no doubt his name would be Tristan. And here we are! His middle names however do have meaning behind them. John is my fathers name, and Michael is Kevin’s. We simply couldn’t decide between honoring both of our dads. So we chose to honor both, which means so much to both of us. Both grandfathers have such a strong influence in our lives and we wanted Tristan to carry on the love through his name forever.
Our friend Rachel May captured us in Tristan’s nursery the week after we got home and we will cherish these photos for a lifetime. Here is our first officially family portrait together, and more to come soon. For now, we will be soaking in every moment in the first couple weeks with our boy. Remembering that every moment is precious, even the hard ones throughout the journey. We feel so blessed to have Tristan here with us and can’t wait to share in this new life with you.